2008. 3. 2 Rev. Kim, Young Bong

The Gospel According to John Sermon Series
“The Gospel of Life (90)”
“Recollection of Pilate 1”
John 18:28-40

1.

My name is Pilate. I was born somewhat earlier than Jesus of Nazareth in central Italy. Similar to the name of my birth place, my name was also known as Pontius Pilate. A large number of famous warriors have come from my hometown. I grew up hearing the stories about the brave worriers who were born and raised in my hometown. Of course, I had ambition to be a mighty worrier and reign the Roman Empire, like them. That was the best honor for men and the best way to be successful in the Roman Empire.

I did very well after I had joined the Roman Army. Whenever I confronted fights, I displayed my superior abilities at the front. During the time, I met many powerful people. I acquired skills to captivate people from young. I used the booty what I’ve got to get people. I thought that investing in people is the most prospective investment. Not for long, I’ve made solid personal connections, and I could connect to anyone in the Imperial Family through one or two people.

The most famous person of those whom I formed friendship with was Tiberius. In your Bible, it is written as Tiberius. He was so excellent that it couldn’t be easy to find any one who surpassed him in history. Later, Tiberius became an emperor and reigned over Roman Empire from AD 14 to 37. After becoming emperor, Tiberius entrusted me with various duties, and I amply satisfied him every time.

In AD 26, Tiberius appointed me as the general governor in Judea. Judea was different place from the other 40 regions where were governed by dispatched general governors from the Roman Empire. Judea did not have strong economic power, but its peculiar faith and tradition were the matter of concerns of the Roman Government. Several governors have been changed previously because it was not easy to govern the Jew. Under this circumstance, I was appointed by the Emperor as the general governor of the region. It was honor for me. Before I started for the post, I had studied about Jewish and Judea as much as I can. It seemed that the position of the general governor of Judea would become a springboard to me to get into the center of the Roman Emperor if I do well there.

2.

It seemed impossible to charm the Jewish, while I also wanted to satisfy the expectations of the Roman Emperor. Anyway, I proceeded to the general governor post with the problem. It was not easy to solve the problem. I learned it the very first day. The first day, my soldiers took several statues of the Emperor to Jerusalem with them. It was a usual practice of the Roman government to set statues of the Roman Emperor at the center of the conquests. It was an intention of announcing that “the land is Roman Emperor’s” by setting the statues of the Emperor at the center of the conquests. As a general governor, I definitely should do that.

The fact became known, and then the whole country was stirred up. Jew mobbed to Caesarea where I was staying. It was as if the entire nation was gathered in, and the end of the mob was endless. They persisted that they would be willing to die if the statues of the Emperor would not be removed. I have learned and known that Jew have strong faith on their religion, but I did not expect that much. I thought I’d better step back strategically.

Experiencing such things at the beginning of the position, I mastered how to manage the Jew in my way. So, I performed my duties as a general governor for 10 years. I put my all effort to keep stability in the Judea, expecting the day the Emperor appoints me to the reigning line of the Roman Imperial. Sometimes with carrots, sometimes with sticks, I governed the Judea. Unfortunately, the position of the governor was the last rung of the ladder in my success. Around AD 36, the Emperor Tiberius who was my supporter was losing his power, I suddenly was fired out from the governor position and came back to my native place.

Ah, the uncertainty of power! After losing the power and coming back to home place, indeed, a question, “what was that I have thought I had possessed?” came up my mind. I thought I possessed everything when I was in power, but after losing the power, I have just empty hands. What did I pursuit so far? I doubted deeply about life. I was still somewhat in good health, but I could not find any reason I have to live longer. The sense of emptiness and meaninglessness was so painful that I have thought many times about committing suicide. But I could not commit even suicide. If I finished my life as a loser, the afterlife would be in darker and more torturous, so I couldn’t have the bravery to do that by myself.

During I was going through such unspeakable bitter days in the sense of hopelessness, helplessness, and emptiness, I recalled a man I had met for a business many years ago. It was that the young Jewish man who I met on the Passover in a year around AD30. I haven’t forgotten him all. After the special meeting, the memory came back into my mind from time to time and bothered me. But I ignored it as just one of unpleasant experiences. I governed the Jew for 10 years, guess! how many times have I had such uncomfortable encounters? I thought that the encounter with him was also one of those unpleasant ones.

But now, after losing everything and living away from the power, the memory of the encounter with him, now comes back into my mind clearly. I have had countless encounters which were much bitterer than the one with the Jewish young man. And every memory sank into oblivion, but only the man, the encounter with Nazareth Jesus, the memory of the encounter with him for few hours comes back now into my mind so vividly. I wonder, why.

3.

Again during the Passover that year, he went from Caesarea to Jerusalem. Passover is the greatest festival of the Jewish people. During that time, a great number of Jewish people gathered in Jerusalem. From time to time, there were people who took the opportunity to instigate the crowds into rebellions. Therefore, during this time of the year, the governor moved into the Antonio fortress next to the Jerusalem temple. The number of soldiers was also greatly increased. The smallest sign of any disturbance was brutally suppressed, for if such action were not taken, the same kind of conspiracy would occur.

On the morning of Passover, when the Jewish people sacrificed the lamb and ate the Passover meal, the leaders of the Jewish people brought Jesus, that native from Nazareth, before him. The governor had already heard some reports about that man. The soldiers would keep watch on the situation of the Jews and, at the smallest sign of trouble, they would secretly infiltrate into the community and return with reports. He had heard early on that this person Jesus attracted many people in Galilee. Among the many areas of Judea, Galilee was notorious for causing the most trouble. Rebellions often originated from there. He suspected something might go wrong and so sent spies and collected reports.

A while later, the spies returned and reported their findings. They reported that Jesus posed no threat to the Roman Empire. In light of Jesus’ teachings and actions, they reported that there were no signs that he planned to incite a revolution against Roman rule. Therefore, the governor was not worried. However, it was exactly that Jesus of Nazareth whom the Jewish people brought to him.

After having presented a bound Jesus of Nazareth, the Jewish leaders waited outside the governor’s residence. Because the Jewish people believed that contact with Gentiles would lead to impurity, they did not enter their houses. So the governor asked them outside, “What accusation do you bring against this man?” (verse 29). They responded, “If this man were not a criminal, we would not have handed him over to you” (verse 30).

“A criminal…”? He knew a few things about this man. There was no evidence that he was a ‘criminal;’ he felt that intuitively. “Ah, this is an argument among themselves.” And if that is the case, it would be better not to get involved, especially in such religious issues. Therefore, he said, “ Take him yourselves and judge him according to your law” (verse 31). The Jews had a legal system as good as that of the Romans, and they also had the Sanhedrin, capable of coming up with independent legal judgments. So he directed the Sanhedrin to independently resolve their issues. In the matter of [Jesus], he thought that would be the best thing.

4.

Unfortunately, my intention did not work. They answered, “But we have no right to execute anyone.” It was true. Jews had no right to execute anyone without permission. In the past, they occasionally decided among themselves and executed their own people. Stephen’s case was as such. Jews were so angry and wound up that they skipped to get an approval from the Governor and took the decision upon themselves and executed him. If such events occur, the high priest is pressed hard by the Governor or Roman Emperor to be accountable for the event.

I was trapped hopelessly. It seems that the leaders of Jews must have decided to execute Jesus of Nazareth. They requested to treat Him as a traitor since He called himself as the king of Jews. Then I have no room to escape. I have no choice but to deal with it.

Without a choice I entered in to the palace of governor and called for Jesus of Nazareth. It is pretty degrading for me as a high Roman officer to deal with a mere wandering preacher in Galilee, but I had no choice. Since I heard rumors about him, I have been curious about him and wanted to meet him once.

I met him as a worthless preacher from a small village. He was pulled before me by the soldiers and he was looking downward. As he was stood in front of me, he slowly lifted up his chin and looked at me. The moment my curious eyes caught his, some mysterious thing happened to me. I felt as if the whole world came to a halt. It must have been only for a few seconds but it seemed eternal to me. It seemed as if I was totally absorbed into his deep pupil.

I couldn’t comprehend at all. I found deep rest, peace and fulfillment during that short moment of halt. I’ve never experienced it before. I felt as if I was lying down hillside of my hometown, or as a baby in mother’s arms. The moment I was absorbed into his pupil I thought ‘Alas, there is this kind of world!’ I wanted to stay in that state eternally. I thought perhaps this must be truly what was looking for while I was pursuing power and wealth. At that moment, I wanted to kneel before him and ask him to let me live forever in the kingdom he governs. I almost did that.

As soon as I made my move to do that, I came back to myself. I was so startled about what I felt and wanted to do a moment ago. I could have made a big mistake. How can it be possible for a Roman governor to kneel before a petty preacher from a small village? How can I ask him to enter his kingdom? What a shame for a Roman governor! It was so close but good to come back to my good sense.

But now that I think about it, I didn’t come to good sense at that time. Actually because I didn’t have good sense, I had been chasing worthless things for my whole life and now I had become this miserable. Now that I look back, the moment I had truly good sense was when I met him, Jesus of Nazareth, and tasted indescribable rest, peace and fulfillment in his eyes during that short moment. But I thought I was losing my mind at that time and came back to old myself quickly.

5.

I asked Him: “Are you the king of Jews?” (verse 33)” Then with still eyes like the depth of the ocean, He replied: “Is that your own idea, or did others talk to you about me?” (verse 34). I cringed the moment I heard His question. It seemed as though He had seen through the thoughts and feelings I was submerged in moments before. My mind heard His query to have the following meaning: “Have you not felt something about me just now? Don’t be concerned of what others say about me, but say what you feel.”

All of a sudden I felt I was being disarmed in front of his person. A feeling of predicament came over me, that if I wasn’t careful I could really be influenced. I felt the need to straighten myself up. So with a forceful voice I replied: “Am I a Jew?" "It was your people and your chief priests who handed you over to me. What is it you have done?” Really, what does it matter whether I am a Jew, a Roman, or a Korean? In the matter of entering the true and everlasting Kingdom, what does it matter what race you are? But I was not yet ready. So I made these excuses.

Then this person said to me: "My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, my servants would fight to prevent my arrest by the Jews. But now my kingdom is from another place." (verse 36). Ah, this person again grabbed the changes I had experienced in my mind, and challenged me. Though it was brief, I felt this. In His eyes I saw a deep rest and peace that I had never seen in this world. I felt that for some reason He wasn’t of this world. Though his outward appearances were ragged, the light in His eyes and face had a transcendental glow that I hadn’t seen even in the Roman emperor. Though at the time I did not know what His kingdom was, I felt that at least He was not of this world.

This person was inviting me to come into His kingdom. Even I could notice this. He was inviting me into His eternal kingdom with words that could not be understood by the servants who were guarding the vicinity. But who am I? I was a governor dreaming to become a Roman emperor. Though I caught a glimpse of the kingdom He spoke of, to me the kingdom of Ceasar, the Roman Empire, seemed more attractive. In order to enter the kingdom Jesus spoke of, I had to let go of my ambitions of the Roman Empire. In order to kneel down before Jesus, who purportedly had come from a kingdom that is not of this world, I may have had to give up all the prestige and privileges as a Roman governor. I could not accept this invitation.

Acting as though I did not understand, I replied: “You are a king, then!" (verse 37). Then this person answered, "You are right in saying I am a king. In fact, for this reason I was born, and for this I came into the world, to testify to the truth. Everyone on the side of truth listens to me." (verse 37). Ah, why was this person tormenting me so? He was again pressing me with these allusive words. “Are you not also of the truth? Do you not understand my words because of this? If so make your decision. Place your hopes not in a false world but come into the Kingdom of truth. I could no longer be pushed so I asked: "What is truth?" With this I left and went out again.

6.

Until then, I put my hope in the Roman Empire only, worked toward gaining power, and showed off that power being satisfied with only gratifying my desires with that power. You may have heard about a Jewish historian, Flavius Josephus. He described me in his history book as a tyranny who would use all means, blinded by his desire for the power. It makes me feel really bad but his evaluation was not without a ground. To me, maintaining the power was truly the top priority and the power was the tool I needed to satisfy my greed.

It is amazing that I got to understand what the man of Nazareth was saying, considering the state I was in. It seems to indicate that I was not completely sold to the power and I was not 100% corrupted. I probably indicated that there was a little of spirituality God created still left in me. It is true that it's rare for a human being to be entirely deaf to the voice of the truth. The intrinsic character cannot be that easily paralyzed. Even for a person like me who is completely absorbed in greed and materialistic pursuit, the intrinsic character of human is still there to hear the voice of the truth.

However, what use is that? If you turn away and refuse an invitation to respond to a soft voice crossing your mind, what use is it to have heard and understood that voice? Come to think of it now, I was quite stupid. Because I was trying to hold onto those things, being illusioned that I could keep it forever, the things I would have to eventually let go of. If I were more serious about the invitation from Jesus of Nazareth, not concerned about saving my face, and accepted his invitation to learn more about the kingdom of the truth he rules as king, I would not have become a person of failure like now. Looking back, that moment was the defining moment in my life.

Now that all those opportunities have passed away, what should I do? Several years have passed since the Jesus I met was executed on the cross by my order. I have heard that a news that the Jesus resurrected was circulating among people but I wouldn't know. I am facing a pitch black darkness, having been thrown into the bottom of the grudge in life. Would my life end like this? If then, what meaning would all the wealth and glory I enjoyed until now have? Would there be another chance coming to me?

Oh, I can still remember his deep gaze. Although it was a brief experience, I remember the deep rest, peace, and sense of fulfillment I felt, soaked in his gaze. During the several decades of being in power of the Roman Empire, I have never experienced that kind of moment. The Roman Empire did not give me that kind of rest, peace, and the sense of fulfillment. If it felt like that for a person who rose up to the governor's position, how would it have been for others? It is evident that even the Roman Emperor would not have known that. I still remember. The emperor's eyes that could not rest for even single moment and move busily! The eyes that were bloodied with insecurity and coveting greed! Compared to that, there was no doubt that the eyes of Jesus of Nazareth embraced eternity. He looked like a person who did not belong to this world but to another world I could not comprehend.

Would such nation really exist? Who was the Jesus of Nazareth who died hung on the cross? He was for sure a man like me but what was that out of ordinariness I felt? Why he did not look like an earthly person although he lived on this earth? As He said does the kingdom of the truth really exist? If that kingdom is like a place I experienced in his eyes, I too want to go there. I regret that I didn't' respond to his invitation sooner to be there now. Since I turned back at the door of that kingdom, how stupid have I been? Was that my last chance? Is there no more hope for me ever?

7.

Let us pray. Close your eyes and think about my story for a moment. I don't want you to become like me. You too, like me, may not have been completely shut out from the Truth. Through various channels, you will hear invitations to come into that kingdom of the Truth. Many of you already responded to that invitation. How joyful it is! I envy you. Growing more in your spiritual life, I wish you will live enjoying the eternal kingdom of God while living in the earthly kingdom.

Perhaps, any of you have turned away from the invitation, avoided, and refused like me, pretending that you didn't hear? What is it? What is it that is keeping you from kneeling down before Jesus of Nazareth? Now that I think about it, I can give up even the place of the Roman Emperor, if I can enter that eternal kingdom. Don't care about saving my face as the governor. I want you to reply to that invitation you are hearing deep in your heart. Then pray. "Jesus of Nazareth, please receive me. Be my king. Draw me into your kingdom. Amen."