2002.5.5. Spring Revival - Rev. Nak In Kim of Valley UMC in CA

Church with grace - Church like family

Ephesians 5:1-7

About this time of last year, the English Ministry development committee for all the Korean United Methodist Churches in the States got together in a Korean UMC in New Jersey. The senior pastors of churches with English Ministry, the ministry administrators, and the second generation ministers met to discuss how to develop good English Ministries that are in absolute need for all immigrant churches.

Talking about various items we would need, we gathered our opinions to do the following:
-forming a network of churches where English Ministry is already in place to facilitate the exchange of ideas to mutually benefit each other
-pursuing campus ministries more aggressively
-visiting seminary schools to inform them of English Ministry opportunities
-organizing a nationwide and UMCwide campaign for English Ministries with a goal of developing 15 second generation churches with English Ministries and 20 campus ministries for the next 4 years.

It was about time when the conference was to be wrapped up after considerable discussion, a second generation minister who's leading a successful ministry raised a hand and started talking.
"I listened to all discussion on the future oriented and progressive vision and am quite encouraged by it. I want to tell you one important thing, though. Many of us currently engaged in English Ministries are very lonely. Because the second generation ministry is still in a developmental stage, there aren't that many of us and there is a lack of understanding on English Ministry. Living in such loneliness, the second generation ministers are struggling with agony and pain. Without finding opportunities to share the feelings of hurts, agony, and isolation to understand and encourage each other, many are leaving the ministries, while challenged by the future visions. This is because they are burned out by reality, considering themselves as failures. Watching all that, many second generations don't even dare to join the ministries. Before talking about starting up 15 new second generation churches and 20 campus ministries, I'd first like to see the current second generation ministers getting together to provide a forum to share difficulties and pains so they can cry, laugh, eat, drink together, and boost one another's spirit."

It was a totally unexpected response that came down like earth shattering thunder. We were unable to see the pain of present age, being clouded by our future vision. It pierced through our hearts. Everyone became somber. Then, a pastor from the Discipleship Department in the UMC headquarter office promised to sponsor and arrange such a meeting right away.

Hearing the second generation minister's agony and moaning from pain, I was reminded of the pain all people experience in their lives. The second generation has their own loneliness and pain and the first generation has their own loneliness and pain as immigrants. Young people have their own pain and loneliness, elderly people have their own pain and loneliness as elderly. Of all human beings living their lives, is there anyone who can escape from this experience of pain and loneliness? We all experience being shackled by this loneliness in our ankles that keep us from moving forward. Because of that hurts and despair, our hearts burn up in black. We feel resentment, regret, and jittery to find ourselves feeling powerless in everything we do and wanting to end it all.

An author of Psalm Chapter 102 confesses,
"My heart is blighted and withered like grass; I forget to eat my food.
Because of my loud groaning, I am reduced to skin and bones.
I am like a desert owl, like an owl among the ruins.
I lie awake; I have become like a bird alone on a roof."

This is the moaning sound of pain and solitude that transcends time. Like a lost traveler standing in desert alone, with no one to share worries and hurt feelings, feeling exhausted, groaning and crying like a desert owl, the author is confessing that lonely nights pass by.

Is this the only way to live our lives, groaning and moaning to bear this heavy burden alone? No. We are designed to receive love and attention to live our lives to look forward.

Today's scripture says, "as dearly loved children…. live a life of love (5:1-2)". It is saying that we should receive and give love to live in hope as we carry this heavy burden alone.

If we realize that God loves us and if we can be compassionate toward one another and love one another with that love, we wouldn't be living in groaning and loneliness.

We become hopeful when we see our existence as beings to be loved and to love others. Most of our problems in life originates from that we are not loved and we are unable to love. We are lonely because we are unloved. We get hurt and saddened because we are not loved. We feel down and out because of no love. Because of no love, we get no courage and become resentful. Because we are not loved, we are not excited about life and have no dream. Because we don't love, we get no sense of fulfillment. Because of no love, we have fear.

There is a nesting place to experience love, to heal wound, and to grow healthy. That is home. Love should be given and taken in a one on one relationship. That's why God gave parents and also brothers and sisters for each one of us to be loved and to grow.

However, unfortunately how many lives get hurt even at home and so far apart from each other because they are unable to love? Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it is written in 1 Corinthians 13:4-5. But how often we act in completely opposite ways in our family treating each other in a totally opposite direction? This is not because we don't know but because we don't have ability to love.

Today's environment doesn't allow us to lead a life of exchanging true love. Ninety three percent of American family these days have both couples working. Fifty percent of married couples end up in divorce and 60% of their second marriages go into divorce again. The proportion of children born from different parents living together in second marriage is gradually increasing.

One of every 15 children is born out of wedlock. 25% of children live with a single parent. Time for family to get together to talk about their day has also decreased. Everyone watches his/her favorite TV program in his/her own room. The duration of time that children spend having meaningful conversation with their mom is 30 minutes a week on average and not even 15 minutes with their dad.

The time to share love is gradually diminishing. We are being deprived of opportunities to experience and learn to love. That's why people feel lonely, empty, solitary among crowd, and fearful about life more than ever, being thirsty for love.

Here the church's mission lies. It is the mission to fill the void of lost love at home. We should become spiritual homes where God is father, the Holy Spirit is mother, Jesus is brother, and the church members are brothers and sisters to share God's love with. Even the Lord Jesus told us about the concept of spiritual family in Luke, "My mother and brothers are those who hear God's word and put it into practice." (Luke 8:21)

It was not a coincidence when the first church the Lord gave us started out as a home-based church. Corinthians church, Ephesians church, Galatians church, Romans church were all small groups gathering at home. In this family like churches, people had fellowship of warm love, teaching, and evangelistic mission work. Witnessing and receiving that love, young faithful minds would grow up to become mature Christians with ability to love.

Corinthians church was full of talents. There were many people with good speaking skills, advanced academic degrees, and good faith. But the church had division among the followers of Paul, Apolo, Peter, and Christ. All had excellent knowledge and everyone tried to teach his own. But there was no love as church.

Looking at a church like this with no love, apostle Paul said clearly that you believed in vain (1 Corinthians 15:2). He said that they are acting like mere men (1 Corinthians 3:3). If no good things are supposed to come out, it's better not to meet (1 Corinthians 11:7?).

To people thirsting for love, telling them about text book like knowledge of love doesn't really help. The knowledge will only make people more bleak and dry. What good does it do to tell people with no food to eat to go home and eat if they are hungry? What good does it do to tell people with no clothes on to go home and wear clothes if they are cold?

Rather than giving them lessons as teachers, we need fellowship of love where we can share pain, encourage, and pray together with love of parents and then bring them clothes and food. Without love, out deep thirst and hunger will not go away.

Some time ago, the mission committee of Valley church instantly decided to give offering to raise hospital funds upon hearing that a church member with no health insurance was ill. They did not boast to anyone. How beautiful it is! The sick person burst into cry, being so grateful and deeply touched. Owing to that love, the person is recovering with courage and hope.

Although parents may lack in knowledge, they can't be compared to school teachers because teachers give knowledge but parents show and practice real love.

In the Bible, the word, knowing, is "Yada or Oida" which refers to the knowledge coming from experience. It never meant the textbook like knowledge. Adam knowing Eve means experiencing Eve. Getting to know God, having knowledge of God comes from experiencing God.

Having experienced the love of God, you and I have to become people wanting to share that love. When this love of experience is shared among us, our lives will become fertile, beautiful, and abundant. People who received a lot of love develop confidence. They become bright and pleasant. People who received a lot of love don't have fear. Love drives away all fear…….

During the past month, many of our church members got sick. Visiting them, I learned that they were thankful for all who came to see them in sickness. When they were lonely, fearful, and weak, the visits they received from small group, mission team, and the church choir gave them enormous spiritual boost and comfort, they confessed.

Also they said that, "when they were sick, I didn't go to see them but when I got sick, they came and I got embarrassed. I thought nobody cared about me. Now that I received that precious love of church family, I would do my best to visit the sick and the lonely when I get well enough to go home." This, is a church like home.

Apostle Paul says "I am again in the pains of childbirth for this love of looking after (Galatians 4:19). Through the pain of childbirth, people should get to experience the love of Christ and grow to become people to share that love in church.

A church in Korea has 600,000 members. Some gossip about the size of the church but the reason why that many people insist on staying there is that people are connected in love with warm heart. Many people in that church have experience of recovering from sickness and failures owing to other church members' all night prayers and prayers in fast.

They were so fearful of death that they didn't know what to do. But the church came to see them, brought them things to eat, looked after the family, and collected money to give another chance to start all over again for those with business failures and suicidal tendency. Once these people got better, they were eager to do the same things to others in illness and despair by visiting them to pray for them and to lift them up.

Parents bleed for a child to be born and give their time, health, money, and effort to raise them. Sometimes difficulties of child rearing go beyond description. But hoping that their children will grow mature, they do not spare any effort to pray and to be patient to bear a child.

We should be able to experience this home like love at church too. By not just getting together to run an event and scatter but by continually experiencing love in small groups and in relationship with other church members, our church will become like home where many peoples' lives are healed, developed to grow mature, and made happy. The church the Lord wants is church where people can feel and experience God's grace through the fellowship with others. I pray in the name of our Lord that Washington KUMC will become a church to experience love like this.